we have officially lost it.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
awoke with 47 plastic lawn flamingos in my bed and on surrounding floor. explanation?
you said they were your minions of evil that protected you from ferrets.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Dick very happy bro
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
Randomize
