Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
