take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
