And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
I wish you could order shots online.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
