Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
