I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
