i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
Do vagina's smell?
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
