Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
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