is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
two words: eviction party
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize
