My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
Enjoy the penises
How does it feel to date your dad?
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Randomize
