David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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