He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Randomize