I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Randomize
