We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Randomize
