The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
PS: I just woke up from my shower
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
