You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Randomize
