I wanna bring you to show and tell
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Randomize
