what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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