out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
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