why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Randomize
