Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize