Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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