I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
