school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Randomize
