I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
