he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Randomize