Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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