tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Randomize
