For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
