I don't remember. Are we still dating?
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Randomize
