who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
