i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
