I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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