My hair reeks of homosexuality.
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
