I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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