I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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