we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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