i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
Randomize
