when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
