she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Randomize
