well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Randomize
