He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
