guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
is this the sara with the beer cane?
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Randomize
