You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize
