He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
He felt like a one man threesome
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
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