It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Randomize
