scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
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