his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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