omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
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