we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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